Last Updated on 29 April 2024
From funny last names to unfortunate overlooked first names and hilarious nicknames, AFL players are more often than not household names among millions of Australians, lets take a look at some of the funniest in all of AFL history.
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Top 10
- Brad Dick
- Danny Dickfos
- Donald McDonald
- Jason Laycock
- Steele Sidebottom
- Wilfred Smallhorn
- Dean Cox
- Donald Dickie
- Stuart Stewart
- Josh Head
Funny AFL Player Names
When choosing names for our kid’s, parents always do their best to ensure the name won’t cause them any drama as they get older; however, sometimes funny names slip under the radar and get shone bright in the AFL spotlight for all to enjoy.
- Billy Stretch – Melbourne
- Blake Acres – St Kilda
- Brad Dick – Collingwood
- Che Cockatoo-Collins – Essendon, Port Adelaide
- Cheynee Stiller – Brisbane
- Clive Waterhouse – Fremantle
- Danny Dickfos – Brisbane
- Dayne Zorko – Brisbane
- Dean Cox – West Coast
- Digby Morrell – North Melbourne, Carlton
- Donald Dickie – Port Adelaide
- Donald McDonald – North Melbourne
- Fabian Francis – Melbourne, Brisbane, Port Adelaide
- Graham Johncock – Adelaide
- Ilija Grgic – Footscray, West Coast Eagles, Essendon
- Irving Mosquito – Essendon
- Jaeger O’Meara – Gold Coast, Hawthorn
- Jason Laycock – Essendon
- Josh Head – Fremantle
- Llane Spaanderman – Brisbane, West Coast Eagles
- Mathew Bate – Melbourne
- Orazio Fantasia – Essendon
- Red Óg Murphy – North Melbourne
- Relton Roberts – Richmond
- Shannon Cox – Collingwood
- Spiro Korkoumelis – Carlton, St Kilda
- Steele Sidebottom – Collingwood
- Stuart Stewart – Hawthorn
- Tyson Goldsack – Collingwood
- Wylie Buzza – Geelong, Port Adelaide
- Zepheniah Skinner – Western Bulldogs
- Wilfred Smallhorn – Fitzroy Lions
AFL Player Nicknames
Over the years there have been a tonne of fantastic nicknames given to AFL players that have not only made us at times have a bit of a chuckle, but others have suited the player so well you can at times forget their real name.
- Albert Collier (Leeter) – Collingwood
- Alex Epis (Kookaburra) – Essendon
- Alex Ishchenko (The Big Russian) – West Coast, Brisbane, North Melbourne
- Andrew Demetriou (Kapil) – North Melbourne
- Anthony Rocca (Pebbles) – Collingwood
- Atu Bosenavulagi (R2) – Collingwood, North Melbourne
- Bailey Smith (Bazlenka) – Western Bulldogs
- Barry Goodingham (Lurch) – North Melbourne, Swans
- Barry Harrison (Hooker) – Collingwood
- Ben King (Kingy) – Gold Coast
- Bernie Dunn (Wizard) – Melbourne
- Bernie Quinlan (Super Boot) – Footscray, Fitzroy
- Bob Davis (The Geelong Flier) – Geelong
- Brian Leahy (Wrecker) – Melbourne
- Brian Roberts (The Whale) – Richmond
- Brian Roet (Doc) – Melbourne
- Brian Taylor (BT & Barge) – Richmond, Collingwood
- Bruce Doull (The Flying Doormat) – Carlton
- Chad Wingard (Chooka) – Hawthorn
- Con Gorozidis (Golden Greek) – St Kilda, Footscray
- Dale Weightman (Flea) – Richmond
- Darrel John Baldock (Doc) – St Kilda
- Darren Millane (Pants) – Collingwood
- David McKay (Swan) – Carlton
- Des Dickson (Delicate Des) – Hawthorn
- Don Bauer (The Tank) – Footscray, Geelong
- Don Fraser junior (Mopsy) – Richmond
- Durak Tucker (Raggy) – Sydney Swans
- Dermott Brereton (The Kid) – Hawthorn
- Edward Greeves Jnr (Carji) -Geelong
- Emmett Dunne (Plod) – Richmond
- Eric G Glass (Tarzan) – Melbourne
- Frank Adams (Bluey) – Melbourne
- Fred Elliott (Pompey) – Carlton
- Fred Fairweather (Stormy) – North Melbourne
- Gary Cowtown (Crazy Horse) – North Melbourne
- Gary Rohan (Chucky) – Geelong
- Garry Hocking (Buddha) – Geelong
- Garry Baker (Bull) – Footscray, Melbourne, Sydney
- Graeme Allan (Gubby) – Fitzroy, Collingwood
- Graham Arthur (Mort) – Hawthorn
- Graham Farmer (Polly) – Geelong
- Greg Williams (Diesel) – Carlton, Geelong
- Henry Anderson (Sport) – Fitzroy
- Ian Hampshire (Bluey) – Geelong, Footscray
- Ian Salmon (Sockeye) – Footscray
- Izak Rankine (Ranks) – Adelaide
- Jack Caesar (Jules) – Essendon
- Jack Dyer (Captain Blood) – Richmond
- Jack Ross (Portia or Valentino) Richmond
- Jasper Pittard (Shamrock 17) – North Melbourne, Port Adelaide
- Jim Jess (The Ghost) – Richmond
- Jim Martin (Bull) – Carlton, Essendon, Fitzroy
- Joe Misiti (Smokin’ Joe) – Essendon
- John Goold (Ragsy) – Carlton
- John M Tilbrook (Diamond Jim) – Melbourne
- John O’Mahoney (Bones) – Hawthorn
- Kade Chandler (Google) – Melbourne
- Kevin C Neale (Cowboy) – St Kilda
- Lance Franklin (Buddy) – Hawthorn
- Laurie Dwyer (Twinkletoes) – North Melbourne
- Leigh Matthews (Lethal) – Hawthorn
- Len J Mills (Booby) – St Kilda, Hawthorn
- Malcolm Seddon (Doc) – Collingwood
- Mat Walker (Fed Express) – Hawthorn
- Matt Parker (MP-400) – Richmond, St Kilda
- Max Walker (Tangles) – Melbourne
- Michael Patterson (Swamp Fox) – Richmond
- Michael Roach (Disco) – Richmond
- Mitch McGovern (Brackets) – Adelaide, Blues
- Nathan Buckley (FIGJAM) – Collingwood
- Ned McHenry (The alpaca) – Adelaide
- Nick Blakey (Lizard) – Sydney
- Norman Clark (Hackenschmidt) – Carlton
- Paul Salmon (Fish) – Essendon, Hawthorn
- Paul Vander Haar (The Flying Dutchman) – Essendon
- Peter Diacos (The Macedonian Marvel) – Collingwood
- Peter Patrick Pius Paul Keenan (Crackers) – Melbourne, North Melbourne, Essendon
- Phil Carman (Fabulous Phil) – Collingwood, Melbourne, Essendon, North Melbourne
- Richard Leffanue (Doc) – South Melbourne, Carlton
- Robert DiPierdomenico (Dipper) – Hawks
- Rod Carter (Tilt) – Fitzroy, Swans
- Ross Dunne (Twiggy) – Collingwood
- Sam Collins (Collo) – Gold Coast, Fremantle
- Sam Kekovich (Slammin’ Sam) – North Melbourne
- Scott Lycett (Ly-chat) – West Coast, Port Adelaide
- Shaun Burgoyne (Silk) – Port Adelaide, Hawthorn
- Simon Prestigiacomo (Humphrey B) – Collingwood
- Stephen Silvagni (SOS) – Carlton
- Terry Wallace (Plough) – Hawthorn, Footscray
- Tom Carroll (Turkey Tom) – Carlton
- Tom Hawkins (Tomahawk) – Geelong
- Tom Joyce (TJ) – South Melbourne
- Tommy Sheridan (Train) – Greater Western Sydney, Fremantle
- Tony Buhagiar (Budgie) – Essendon
- Val Perovic (Woof) – Carlton
- Vin Catoggio (Spinner) – Carlton
- Warwick Armstrong (The Big Ship) – South Melbourne
- Wayne Carey (The King, Duck) – North Melbourne
- Wayne Henwood (Moose) – Sydney
- Wilford Smallhorn (Chicken) – Fitzroy
- Xavier O’Neill (Skinny X) – West Coast
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